Tag Archives: reflection

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    What Makes you Tick?

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    What Makes You Tick?

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    You know, they say that it takes all kinds to make the world go around. To everyone, there are different ideas, traditions, views, values and purposes in life that skew the way we move forward in life. To some, it is the tradition of family. Maybe going to grandma’s and grandpa’s house on Sunday after church for lunch with the whole family is tradition. Maybe a dad instilling in his children a hard work ethic your word is your word, a handshake between two people is a contract, showing up for work on time and giving your all to the company you work for.

    How you make decisions in life, in relationships, at work or play depends on the values that drive you. Your values reflect your beliefs about how life should be. To take it a little further- do your values line up to what you tell others? Do you put those words into action? So say you tell a friend that you value a healthy lifestyle with staying fit, exercising every day, eating fresh whole, organic foods, but yet when you go out to eat together, you’re actually getting the cheeseburger-loaded, French fries, and chocolate shake. Your values and beliefs now have no meaning as you have given a mixed signal to your friend. Or maybe you made a promise to your child to come watch them play ball and “something came up.” Continue reading →

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      Learning to Let Go

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      Article By Author Paula Span, New York Times“>

      Article By Author Paula Span, New York Times

      The conversation took place two years ago, but Dr. Daniel Matlock still recalls it quite vividly. You tend to remember when a physician colleague essentially brands you a Nazi.

      Dr. Matlock, a geriatrician who specializes in palliative care, had been called in to consult when a woman in her 70s arrived at the University of Colorado Hospital, unresponsive after a major stroke.

      She’d done what we’re forever chiding people for not doing: She’d drafted a very specific advance directive and had even taken the trouble to have it notarized. It unambiguously said: no life support, no artificial nutrition or hydration, no nursing home.

      The ambulance crew had put her on a ventilator — standard procedure. After the palliative team removed it, she was able to breathe on her own, which isn’t uncommon. She even opened her eyes, though she couldn’t track or follow objects and remained unresponsive. That’s when the prominent surgeon directing her care ordered intravenous fluids.

      Dr. Matlock, alarmed at this direct contradiction of her preferences, tells the rest of the story in a post on the GeriPal blog, published by geriatricians and palliative care docs at the University of California, San Francisco. After talking with the patient’s sister, who held her medical power of attorney, he called the surgeon to suggest stopping the IV. Continue reading →

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        The Gift

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        What are some things you can name on one hand that in your lifetime, are the most precious gifts that have been given to you? It may be a fine piece of jewelry that has been handed down from generation to generation. Or could it be the family bible that is on the coffee table? How about the family photo album? One of the single most important gifts that were ever given to me was the opportunity to become a mother.

        As some of my very close friends know, in my early working years I wanted a husband, house, career, and to go fishing. And you know children, “they cost too much”, “your life will never be the same again”, you will “never sleep again the rest of your life,”, and best yet “this world is too awful to raise a child in now days.” No children were ever a part of my “plan.” My selfish way of thinking that children would just interrupt what life had to offer, would soon come to an end. God had better plans. As time went along-my female hormones telling me my “time’s ticking”, “you don’t have much time”, and “you’re only getting older” started nagging me. God prodding me and my husband had a way of changing our mind on the concept of bearing children. Continue reading →

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          Death of a Billionaire

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          Death is no respecter of persons.  It is simply an inevitable moment that we are all marching toward, whether we acknowledge it along the way or not.  I think about that moment often.  I’m not sure if that’s a function of getting a little older, or solely due to my career path; it’s probably both.  Over the last five years, I have seen the dying process in hundreds of its myriad manifestations, some more admirable than others.  Each and every one has etched its story into my own.

          I’m asked frequently whether my job is depressing, or if I have difficulty not bringing my work home.  With few exceptions, I can honestly answer an unequivocal, “No”.  In fact, I don’t find caring for dying patients depressing at all.  There have been more sad moments than I can count, but that number is dwarfed by the moments that I count as joy.  I have learned a lot from dying patients and their families, and hopefully I have honored some of those pearls by applying them to my own life. Continue reading →

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            Celebrating Memories

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            This past weekend, Solaris celebrated with families in our annual Memorial to honor their loved ones. It is a time of remembrance for the families and for our staff. Dr. Kelley Tibbels was our guest speaker for the event and he talked about memories and legacy, about the importance of passing down from generation to generation the simple things like a firm handshake, and how your word was your word and that it meant you were going to do what you said.

            He said that growing up, he was not a “hugger” and that he learned to hug from his mother in law, who has since passed away. Some of the families that were there shared legacies of their mother and how she had unconditional love for their family. Another talked about how cooking to their mother was very important and anyone that came over would never leave hungry.

            During the memorial, we blended two different colors of sand signifying that as the sand can no longer be separated neither can the memories of our loved ones.  As much as our families shared stories about their loved ones, they were also deeply appreciative of our staff for their knowledge in getting their loved one out of pain, the comforting visits to pray for them, or the volunteer to allow them to rest. Continue reading →